FF Let me Love You - Part 41

 
 

okay I know  I promised LIDV this week but somehow after the previous update of LMLY, it felt important to post this update this week itself and honestly when it comes to this story, the words do not stop ... I just keep on writing ! 

so yes ... as promised .. heart to heart ... there is only Arnav & Khushi in this update !

Happy Reading !





Once inside their room, Arnav locked it shut before turning to Khushi who was sitting on their bed, she was watching him, he could see her eyes pleading him to talk to her but words failed him today, he was at loss for all the emotions that overwhelmed him, he didn't even know how to tell her everything without causing her pain, he didn't want her to feel the trauma anymore, she had suffered too much already, even as he walked upto her, his eyes were drinking in her sight,
Her tresses flying slightly around her face because of the wind flowing in through the open windows, clad in a simple cotton top and jeans, her face unadorned, a small bindi on her forehead, she looked so innocent, so pure, so beautiful, and yet he knew that beneath the faade, there were memories that she wished to forget, memories of a hell that she had to endure while being alive.
He knelt down by her side and held her hands in his, he kissed each finger softly, and then he kissed the inside of her palms, he hugged himself close to her warmth and he felt her hands come around him and envelop him into a hug, the wave of peace that engulfed him whilst being in her arms, to feel the pulse of her heart and know that she is alive and holding him, protecting him from all the pain he had to endure in the past hours, and right then Arnav truly realized how precious she had come to be in his life, she was literally the reason he was alive, the reason he lived for and hell be damned, he wouldn't let anything happen to her !
He looked at her, his fingers grazing the side of her face, her wide anxious eyes asking him what had happened that was hurting him so much and he knew that he couldn't hide the truth from her, she deserved to know the truth and he knew she was strong enough, his Khushi was a fighter, he got up and sat in bed next her and kept his head on her lap, his face facing hers, his eyes looking straight into hers, he held her hands clasped tightly in his,
" Khushi, what am about to tell you, hear me out, do not stop me in between and once I finish, you can tell whatever it is that you feel but promise me that you wont let this consume you or break you apart, I want you to fight the demons Khushi, I want you to show them that beasts like them cant taint your heart or your body, promise me that you will fight along with me"  said Arnav as Khushi looked at him, she increased the grip of her hands in his as she replied,
" I promised you already Arnav, I have chosen to live my life with you, to walk with you as your wife till the end of times and whatever life throws at us, I will be there to face it with you. Now tell me what happened ? "
Arnav felt a sense of calm in his heart at Khushi's resilience as he started to narrate everything that had happened,
" Khushi, as part of the ongoing investigation against Nikhil, Rehaan and Zee have been tracking down his entire life, his friends, relations, personal and official assets, his financial transactions etc etc. we were mainly doing this so as to collect all those tapes and images that he has of you, plan was to collect them all so that it doesn't fall into the wrong hands.
Rehaan managed to confiscate all his assets but there was this one property Rehaan found, which was gifted to Nikhil by your father and since I wasn't around, Rehaan went there to check it out and what he saw there ... "
Arnav couldn't go on, his eyes fell shut as he tried to muster the courage to tell her, he felt her stroking his forehead,
" go on Arnav .. what did Rehaan see ? " asked Khushi as she held him.
Arnav steeled himself as he resumed speaking,
"  Khushi ... Rehaan came back from the house absolutely broken and shattered, and he narrated everything that he saw there to Akash and Zee because he was worried as to how I would take it but I saw them talking, I saw their pain and they couldn't hide it for long and so they told me.
Khushi I went to the house a few hours back, we all did .. Akash and Zee never saw the room though they know whats in there but I did "
Khushi's heart began to pick up pace, her eyes reflected fear, she could already sense what Arnav must have seen there but she didn't want him to stop, she urged him to continue speaking,
" what did you see there Arnav ? "
" Khushi ... the room I was in, it was hell. If there is ever a hell in Arnav Singh Raizada's life then its in that room. Khushi the room I was in, its in the same house used by the Guptas as their guest house, which your father gifted to Nikhil, I was in the room where they almost killed the woman I love ! " said Arnav, his eyes welling up in tears again.
Khushi felt her heart twist and knot as the memories engulfed her but she fought it as she held onto Arnav because she could feel the raging pain in him, she could see the struggle with which he was finding words to tell her what he saw there,
" don't stop Arnav ... tell me what you saw" 
Arnav held her close, his face pressing into her bosom as he continued,
" the bas***d, Vaid .. he had the walls lined with your images, too many of them Khushi ... Each one of them depicting your pain and tragedy of that hated day in your life, there was a TV screen in the room and if you switch it on ... Nikhil wasn't lying to us Khushi, he really has everything recorded in tape, the tapes played one after the other Khushi and I could do nothing but watch you.
It felt as though I was there with you and yet could do nothing to save you !
I saw that day in your life Khushi. I saw your pain ... your agony.
Until today, all the pain I thought I understood was from the memories you shared with me but today, now I know the true horror of what they did to you.
I saw everything Khushi ... forgive me but   couldn't run from there like a coward in the face of your agony. "
Khushi sat still, but her grip on Arnav didn't relent, her heart felt heavy under the onslaught of emotions, she couldn't gather her thoughts anymore, the memories were burned into her memory as clearly as it would be on tape, tape could be erased but not her memory !
The nightmares of that day had decreased ever since Arnav entered her life but she would never forget the day and to know that Arnav had come face to face with the very day in her life which she never wanted to visit ever again.
She looked down at him and all she saw was the pain and anguish and helplessness in his eyes as he looked at her, now she understood why Akash Rehaan and Zee had made that promise to her. She could so clearly understand their pain and how she wished they never had to deal with it.
She felt Arnav wiping away the tears that she couldn't stop, he got up and pulled her into his arms, hugging her close, Arnav let her shed out all her pain as he cried with her.
After a while he spoke to her,
" talk to me Khushi ... don't hold back ... its all been laid bare for us now "
Khushi pulled back a little and looked at him, her fingers caressing his face, he was shocked to see her smile through her tears and her words that came after left him astounded, shocked as he realized how much her trust in his love had healed her,
" what do I say Arnav ?
Yes am hurt ... am in pain ... but its not for myself or what happened that day, my pain is for you, for Akash Zee and Rehaan who had to deal with the reality that I never wanted anyone of you to know.
You walked into the house, knowing the horror that lay within, you had to see me at my weakest hours and I know the feeling of helplessness you must have felt, I saw the same in Rahul when he first found me in that mess, he was my brother and it killed him to see me that way, you are my husband, the pain you must have felt seeing the woman you love bleeding to her almost death, its worse than any pain that any man could ever endure ! its equal to death and yet you faced it all alone !
Rehaan walked into the unknown and he is enduring the same pain that I saw in Rahul's eyes.
But look at me Arnav ... don't you understand ? I am one of the luckiest women alive today !
Most of the women who have been in my place, they were abandoned by their families friends and the society, they were cast away to bleed to their deaths, they .. the victims were termed as the culprits, they perished Arnav, they died all alone knowing that they were hated for crimes they never committed.
And look at me, my own family threw me into that hell but they couldn't destroy me, Rahul came for me, he saved me, he avenged my death at the cost of his life, he left me in the protection of Naina and Alaka until you came along, you Arnav ... you took me into your life as though I were the center of yr universe, despite knowing everything that happened, you love me unconditionally.
You gave me a family that's mine more than my own blood could ever come to be !
Maa Papa Pari Akash Alisha Zee Rehaan ... I have each one of you to hold onto.
Aryan and Naina who have already done so much for my protection ... I can never stop counting my blessings ever !
Today after everything that happened, I have 3 brothers who promised me they would always protect me.
And I have YOU.
Arnav, today you saw something that no man would ever want to see of the woman he loves. Most of the men, if they were put in your place, they would have abandoned me, never bothered to look at me again, they would never want me or any woman who has been in my place !
And yet you returned to me, you never even once hesitated to touch me, to show me your love, I can see the pain in your eyes but you aren't disgusted at me.
You love me Arnav ... and none of what happened to me could ever blemish that love of yours.
What more do I want Arnav ?
Everything I need .. I already have it. I have you.
I have run away too many times from you thinking that I was doing it for your happiness but then I promised you last time Arnav, that am choosing you and our future over my past and I intend for us to live our happily ever after Arnav.
I wont let my past ruin it for us.
I love you Arnav and I trust you. " said Khushi as she kissed him on his lips.
Arnav who was too shocked to respond, gathered her close as he kissed her back a moment later. It wasn't a kiss of passion or need.
It was the promise of unconditional love.
They broke apart after a while, Arnav looked at her, there was one more thing he had to do, he took her hand in his,
" Khushi I know you trust me ... so if I do something now, can you just believe in my love and let me do it and not stop me ? " asked Arnav.
Khushi was puzzled by Arnav's request but she nodded her head in agreement.
Arnav left the bed and went to draw the curtains and shut the window, the pale light from the lanterns in the room illuminated their surroundings giving it an ethereal glow. He came to her and took her by her hands and made her stand in the center of the room, he held her hands as he spoke to her,
" Khushi ... I have felt that I am married to you from the day I first saw you, you are already my wife to me in my heart but like I promised you, I will give you the wedding of your dreams and the first time I make love to you will be on the night when the world knows that you are my bride, the love of my life.
But today, Khushi I saw your wounds, I saw you bleed, I saw the bruises on your body and I can never forget it or ignore it.
I love you body and soul Khushi, and I want to heal the wounds, the ones in your soul and the ones in your body.
I am not asking for your permission Khushi ... I am just asking you to trust me, trust me to allow me to heal those wounds which I know are still there, lingering traces of the horror you faced. "
Khushi barely breathed, she didn't refuse, she closed her eyes as she remembered the wounds, Arnav was right, she still had the traces on her body, marks on her arms and limbs and torso that refused to fade away, and deep in her heart, she didn't want to hide them from Arnav anymore, she wanted to feel his touch.
Arnav didn't want to intimidate her so he took off his shirt first so that she wouldn't feel uncomfortable being exposed in his presence.
She opened her eyes to see him standing shirtless in front of her, he moved closer to her and slowly removed her top from her body, and then he removed the jeans she was wearing, Khushi stood in front of him in her inner wear, her eyes echoed the peace in her heart, there would be no more secrets between them.
Arnav took her hands in his, he saw the slight marks in her arms and he kissed each one of them, letting her feel his touch, allowing it to sink deep into her senses.
There were marks in her chest ... her bare waist ... her legs ... and he kissed them all without hesitance, it felt as though he were talking to her body and to her soul, he kissed each one of our wound marks, letting them know that each one of her scars was precious to him, that he loved them all, that they were the mark of her strength and survival.
His fingers lightly caressed her body, his lips leaving its touch on her marks, she felt enveloped in his essence, she could hear the beat of his heart, she could feel his touch, she could see his eyes which never left hers, that moment and Khushi felt as pure as any woman could ever feel, the horrors of her past seemed to fade away, all she could remember was Arnav, the man she had given her heart and soul to.
Khushi felt her heart pick up pace as she felt his touch scorch her senses, he hadn't missed a single scar, he had found them all and loved them unconditionally.
She opened her eyes to see him smile at her, he took her hand and led her into the shower, where they stripped away the little amount of clothing on their bodies, he turned on the shower and they stood under it, letting the water cascade down their bodies that were completely nude and laid bare.
They held onto each other, felt the water cleanse their body and soul, they shed a few tears ... they cried a little ... they laughed a little ... their eyes echoed their love for each other, their hands caressed each other without inhibitions. The felt the water wash away the dirt of their past. To Arnav, everything that happened to Khushi ... all her pain .. he imbibed them onto himself.
And as they stood there with their bodies laid bare, touching each other head to toe, there wasn't an iota of lust or desire they felt, they didn't feel the need to possess each other like lovers would do, they were attracted to each other, deeply attracted but they both wanted the blending of their bodies and souls to be born out of love and not as an escape from the horrors of their past.
Arnav turned off the shower, he wrapped her in a white towel and took her out of the cubicle and then he wiped away the water on her body, after which she did the same, they walked into their bedroom and without a word, he lifted her into his arms and placed her gently on the bed, he switched off the lights and got in next to her and held her close, stroking her face, occasionally peppering her faces with kisses, he slowly lulled her to sleep, he saw her close her eyes and drift off into a peaceful sleep with a beautiful smile adorning her face. And soon he too fell asleep, his face buried into the crook of her neck, their bodies held close as they clasped each other tight, a tangle of arms and legs, they slept like a pair of entwined souls they were.

Arnav through his act wanted Khushi to know that she could sleep bare with him, the man she loved  without the fear of having to meet his sexual needs, he wanted her to know that he wasn't in love with just her physical beauty but also her soul. He wanted her to feel safe and protected in their physical intimacy, she had been scarred by the brutal touch of men who were animals, and he wanted her to know that a man's touch could be loving and caring too ... he wanted her to know that he would always protect her and so he did.

Khushi slept that night, completely naked in the arms of her husband, Arnav was the first man in her life to whom she had laid bare her soul and body without any fears and her trust in him was iron clad, he had become the man who had healed every single wound in her body and her soul, given to her by men who were nothing short of animals. She could feel it in her soul that Arnav's touch wasn't born out of lust but out of his unconditional love for her.